If you've ever tried to change something about yourself, your habits, patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving, your routines, how you relate to others, mistakes you keep making, then you've probably already discovered that your will power can only get you so far. Chances are, you’ve tried in the past to create the change you want, but you’ve ended up feeling as though you’re at war with yourself. No matter how much you attempt to take charge of yourself, usually by becoming your own kind of Sargent Major, bossing yourself about and berating yourself for every failure, you still can’t get yourself to toe the line. You end up feeling like you are notthe boss of you at all!
Well, actually, you are the boss of you. You are the Captain of your ship! It’s just that you need to know how you work. You need to know how to operate your controls. It’s like driving a car. Before you learnt to drive, you had no control over your vehicle, with possible calamitous consequences! But, once you learnt how to drive and you’d had plenty of practice, it became easy. Now, it’s something you probably do without thinking about it at all.
How you work
There are three levels of mind:
- The Conscious Mind– Your present awareness, the source of will power, judging and decision-making and capacity for rational “objectivity”.
- The Subconscious Mind– The repository of every experience, thought and feeling you’ve ever had, the source of creativity, unfettered by any judgement (only the conscious mind judges), and capacity for emotional “subjectivity” (sometimes referred to as the “Chimp Mind”!).
- The Superconscious Mind– Your Higher-Self, or the Self you aspire to be, the source of love and courage, and capacity for transpersonal “intuition”.
To make the change you want, you're going to need to corral the whole of your mind. Your Superconscious Mind has birthed the desire for the change and the Conscious Mind has judged and decided that the desire is good. Now you’re going to need to get your subconscious mind on board!
There are four things you need to know about the Subconscious Mind:
- It has incredible power to create the reality you want and it always does what you tell it to do. The key to making the change you want is to tell your subconscious what you want, Unfortunately, it’s quite likely that you are in the habit of telling it to create what you don’t want, not what you do want.
- It doesn’t speak English. It only understands the images that your words create in your mind’s eye. And we’re often not very good at talking to ourselves in ways that create the kinds of images that will put our subconscious to work in the right direction. For example, when you say, “I really want to stop smoking”, the image you create may be of you “really wanting”, or of you smoking, or of you putting out another cigarette. And your subconscious mind directs its power towards creating that reality for you. The key to making the change you want is to talk to yourself in ways that will create images of the change you want. For example, “I am choosing to refuse to smoke and I’m loving how that feels!”
- It will always move you towards pleasure and away from pain. This sounds promising enough, until you realise that you often link pain and pleasure to the very same things! For example, you might link a great deal of pleasure to being at a lower weight than you are, but you also link a great deal of pain to eating healthily and exercising. And, however much you try to motivate yourself to achieve your goals, your subconscious will always prioritise moving you away from the pain you associate with what it is going to take to achieve them. It’s not its job to make you happy. Its job is to keep you alive! The key to making the change you want is in recalibrating the links you make between pleasure and pain and the change you want. It’s all about what you believe. There are no more powerful words in the universe than the words you say to yourself and believe. But belief is only a habit of thinking. A belief is only a thought you keep thinking.
- It loves what is familiar and hates what is unfamiliar. The key to making lasting change is to make the familiar unfamiliar and the unfamiliar familiar! Let’s face it, we all get into habits of thinking that really don’t help us. For example, “I can’t give a speech at X’s wedding. I can’t talk in front of all those people! I’ll have a panic attack!” These are the kinds of things we’ll be telling ourselves, not just once, but over and over again, day in, day out. The subconscious loves what’s familiar. And that negative self-talk is very familiar! If you’re going to replace it with positive self-talk, the kind of self-talk that gets your subconscious working to create the reality you want, then you’re going to have to make a real effort, for a while at least, to repeat it over and over again, until what you do becomes who you are, and what you tell yourself becomes what you believe.
“There are no more powerful words in the Universe
than the words you say to yourself and believe.” - Marisa Peer
"A belief is only a thought that you keep thinking and the only thing
that keeps you from who you really are and what you really want
– is a belief." - Abraham Hicks
To achieve the change you want, you’re going to need to reprogramme your subconscious mind.
There are various ways this can be achieved, for example, through education, counselling and psychotherapy (although these could take years), but Hypnotherapy is widely accepted as a very fast and effective method.
You’ll be guided into a state of deep relaxation. People often refer to the hypnotic state as “trance” or “sleep”, and these terms can put people right off! They’ve seen stage hypnotists and they don’t like the idea of being vulnerable and not being in control.
The truth is that you are completely conscious and you’re completely in control at all times. Hypnosis is not a special, rare state. You will drift in and out of the state of hypnosis many times throughout your normal day. Every time you’ve driven home and realised that you weren’t paying attention to how you got there, because you were deep in thought about that argument you had with Mavis at work, every time you were watching a movie and were so engrossed in the drama of it that you forgot you were sitting in the cinema, every time you were reading a book and were gripped by the plot and the imagery, you were in a state of hypnosis.
Hypnosis is not about “trance” or “sleep” it’s about being willing to accept suggestions; suggestions that you know are completely and entirely for your benefit. Even so, it can be difficult for the more sceptical, cynical, or analytical of us to let go of the judging, conscious state. Knowing that you’re safe and feeling that you can trust me is important. That’s why I offer a free 30 minute Introduction Session, so that we can discuss what you want from the therapy and I can get the information I need to personalise and tailor your Hypnotherapy Session to you and the goals you want to achieve.